Expecting to see members of the Vampire Cruise, someone asked a friend where all the vampires were. He suggested that the vampires must be in their coffins on board the ship since it's always daytime in Alaska at this time of year.
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A local woman passed a family hiking up to Lower Lake. One of the kids in the party assured another, “Don’t worry, there will be a water fountain at the top.”
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A man asked if there were any male park rangers anymore, since all he's seen are female rangers.
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A tourist pointed to the AB Hall and asked, “Is that covered in caribou bones?”
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“Who’s Soapy Smith?” a visitor asked a companion.
“Oh, you know, the guy who started Skagway.”
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A man walked into the bookstore and asked about all the Cat. names in the window. When told he was looking at names of runners who had placed in different categories of the Skagway News Runaround, he said, “Oh, I thought you guys had a race with cats or something.”
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“The SMART bus sign says the buses run from May 1 to October 1. What do people do the rest of the year?”

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A couple came in to the visitor center and wanted to know why so many buildings in town had ladders on their roofs. The staff seemed unsure of what they meant, but the couple offered the suggestion that perhaps they were for people to escape from the bears. The staff is still unsure what ladders they were referring to but the couple said they would keep asking around.
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An avid fisherman from Outside comes in and asks about salmon fishing. He is told the port area is closed to salmon fishing as of July 1, until the escapement goal is reached. Not interested in doing a charter, he asks about trout fishing. The portly gent is told that trout fishing is a hike up the mountainside, and he frowns. Asked where he's going next, he says Juneau and Ketchikan. Told there's catch and release cut throat trout fishing in Ketchikan, he asks, "In a stream?"
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A man came in to the visitor center and said he was told the road closed in the winter. He was told that the road stays open year-round.
"But why would anyone want to come here in the winter?"
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A couple came up to the lady at the visitor center desk, whose name is Rain. They saw her name tag which read "Rain" They said, "I see you have rain posted for today's weather, does that mean that if it's "Scattered showers" you would have a tag that says "Scattered"? "
A man and his wife came into the visitor center and looked at the plaque over the counter and says confidently to his wife: "See honey this place was a labor union."
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An agitated man comes into the visitor center and points at the Alaska map, points to the Aleutian Chain and demands to know which islands President Obama has given away to Russia. He is told that is not so. A little research revealed it was President George H.W. Bush, who signed a 1991 treaty with Russia permanently establishing a maritime boundary with that country, putting seven islands off the Kamchatka Peninsula and Russia's northern coast on Russia's side. The State Department states no U.S. claims have ever been made for the islands.
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Overhead on the boardwalk: “There’s got to be casinos here. That’s why there are so many tour buses.”•

Well, things are different up here, folks. Up in Dawson City, where I got lucky on a spin last week, I saw just a couple of tour buses and none were parked at Diamond Tooth Gertie’s Casino. The wind is definitely picking up out there, and soon there will be salmon and a certain scent in the air. Keep the wind coming and the dogs out of the creek. We don’t want any wind that has been rolled in.